To mark Parent Mental Health Day (30 January), our friends at WAY Widowed and Young are shining a light on the strength, wisdom and resilience of widowed parents who are caring for bereaved children. Navigating the challenges of parenting while grieving can feel overwhelming, but small steps and supportive strategies can make a big difference.
Here, four widowed parents share some really helpful words of advice – from accepting help to finding moments of self-care – to help other parents who find themselves in similar situations to prioritise their own mental health and well-being so that they can be the best parents they can possibly be.
Rachel, WAY Member:
My brief break in the day is after I drop my daughter off at school at 8:45 and the walk down the hill to get back to my house. That’s like my moment for myself before the workday starts
“It is important to look after my own mental health. I think it is really easy to put yourself last and I probably do put myself way down the list in terms of needs, but I’ve learned to push it slightly higher up to look after my own mental health in just small ways – like trying to get out for a little walk for 15 minutes when I’m working at home. Or taking the long route to school to get a bit more time outside and alone. I often laugh that my only free time in the week is the short commute to school, which is genuinely 100 metres.”
Andrew, WAY Member:
Go easy on yourself. Don’t beat yourself up when you’re struggling, and things go wrong
“Enjoy the moments when you’re feeling positive, strong and creative. They will come, increasingly frequently. And in between it can seem impossible to carry on but that’s OK, and will pass.
“Be there for your children. We don’t get everything right as parents but just be there when they need support.
“Reach out when you need support. Sometimes people need to be told by you what you need. And sometimes it’s the people you least expect who will step up. Make it clear that you might need them in a month, six months, a year’s time. This isn’t a straightforward journey.”
Sophie, WAY Member:
Accepting help doesn’t mean you’re unable to cope – it means you’re wisely choosing to prioritise your valuable energy where it’s needed most
“Accept help. People aren’t offering because they pity you, they’re offering because they want to be able to help in some way. Accepting help can feel difficult so see if you can assign a friend or family member to manage the offers.
“Assign specific tasks to people e.g. cooking on certain days, or walking the dog, helping with school runs, or doing the washing for you, or handling some admin tasks.”
Orlanda, WAY Member:
A good friend of mine said – when in doubt, wash your hair! I live by that!
“If someone offers to watch your child or give you a break – take it – even if you think don’t need it, you do! Go and have a lie down. They want to help, and even 5 minutes of quiet time can re-charge you.
“Don’t put too much pressure on yourself. You can’t be two people. Don’t do it to yourself. I often try to remind myself of that, because it’s so true but when I try to do it all, all that happens is I burn out! I’ve recently realised that I try to tag my selfcare onto something else – for example, when I take my daughter swimming, while she’s showering and having a snack, I treat myself to a facemask!”

About WAY
The WAY Widowed and Young community offers a safe space to talk to other people (both with and without children) who understand how it feels to be widowed at a young age.
Find out how WAY can support you at www.widowedandyoung.org.uk


Helping a child or young person with their grief and mental health
Losing someone you love can be really tough, especially for children and young people. This can have a profound impact on their mental health.
To help, we’ve put together ways you can help those who you are supporting with their grief and mental health.

Take time to remember your important person as a family with our crafty activities.
Our activities are designed to help you check in and talk with the children and young people and see how they are coping with their grief. It’s a great way to talk about grief while creating a unique keepsake for their important person.