Dad and son sat on a sofa reading a book together and making hand gestures

Books to help children with special educational needs and disabilities understand grief

We all grieve and children with special educational needs and disabilities (SEND) are no different. Stories and books are a great way to help all children, especially children with SEND, explore their grief. So, our practitioners have chosen some books that may help children and young people with SEND to understand grief and bereavement.

Children and young people with additional needs will feel grief. Some may find it hard to remember and feel connected to the person who has died. Some may have difficulty understanding death and it may impact on their ability to manage changes that comes after a bereavement.

Young people with SEND may be able to benefit from books which are aimed at their developmental age (the age they are functioning at) rather than their chronological age (the age they actually are). These are our suggested books. You will know the child or young person best so take a look and see which you think may work for them.

Remembering Lucy: A Story about Loss and Grief in a School

Sarah Helton, age 3+ years

An illustrated story book about bereavement and grief for children attending SEND schools. Joe, an eight-year-old boy who attends a special school tells the story of his school and what happens when one of his friends dies.

Life is Like the Wind

Shona Innes and Irisz Agocs, age 3-6 years

A simple explanation of life and death with beautiful illustrations. The book explains different ideas about what happens after death but ends with ‘like the wind life must leave and go somewhere else’ and allows the reader to make up their own mind.

I Miss You

Pat Thomas and Lesley Harker, age 3-6 years

This book has clear and simple text and includes question prompts throughout to spark conversation. It does talk about someone’s soul but could be adapted by the reader if that’s not your belief.

A Jumble of Knotted Thoughts

Sarah Helton, age 4-7 years

A sensory story to support bereavement and grief. The story is written for individuals with special educational needs and disabilities (SEND) and young children (primary school age).

Badger’s Parting Gifts

Susan Varley, age 4-8 years

A lovely picture book using animal characters that may help children to understand and relate to feelings related to bereavement.

The Day the Sea Went Out and Never Came Back

Margot Sunderland, age 4-12 years

With beautiful illustrations, this is an ideal book for starting conversations with children about grief and sadness.

A Sky Full of Diamonds

Camille Gibbs, age 5-9 years

Written in the first person, this is Mia’s experience of the different emotions of grief after her mum dies. The book is very visual with great pictures, but it is quite wordy so better for young people with an older developmental age.

I Have a Question about Death

Gaines and Polsky, age 5-11 years

This book is written specifically for children on the Autism Spectrum or with other additional needs. It is from the point of view of a young person who has just found out someone has died, and they have lots of questions, which are answered in a simple way through images and straightforward answers.

Upside Down, Downside Up

Ilze lee, age 7-10 years

Told through the eyes of eight-year-old Leah, this book tells the story of two young siblings learning to cope with the death of their father. Taking a step-by-step approach, this is a chapter and journal book with some great activities throughout. It’s not specifically aimed at young people with additional needs but could be accessed depending on individual needs.

The Goodbye Book

Todd Parr, age 3-8 years

Told through the eyes of a pet fish who is now swimming alone, this book shows how to say goodbye in a very accessible way. With simple pictures and short sentences, this book can be enjoyed by all.

Support for grieving young people

Our bereavement support workers are available to offer information, guidance and support, right away. Reach out on 08088 020 021 or use our live chat (click the blue ‘chat’ button on the bottom right of your screen) between 8am and 8pm, Monday to Friday. You can also email us on ask@winstonswish.org and we’ll get back to you within two working days.

For out of hours mental help support, text WW to 85258 to speak with someone from our trusted partner, Shout. For urgent support in a crisis, please call 999.

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